Monday, June 24, 2013

One Year Ago Today...

One year ago today I found out I was pregnant.  Looking back I realized that I have never told the story here.  Dufda and I had taken our honeymoon, 8 months after we were married, to Jordan.  I had never met his family or knew where he came from.  We knew that this would be the month we would start trying to get pregnant.  The plan was that Dufda would stay in Jordan to be with his family, while I returned home to go back to work.  After an awful day of traveling by myself I made it home June 23, 2012.  That next day I went to the grocery store to pick up some essentials because I had not been home in so long.  I decided I would grab a pregnancy test while I was there.  They were buy one get one free, but I didn't realize until I was up at the register.  I figured I would test my luck and hope that I didn't need the free one.  When I got home it was 8pm.  You are suppose to wait till the morning to test, but I figured I would give it a go.  I was pregnant (obviously, or we wouldn't be here)!  Since it was 8 o'clock here, it was in the middle of the night in Jordan and I couldn't get a hold of Dufda.  I kept calling and leaving him messages but knew he wouldn't get them till morning.  When he finally woke up, he seemed so unsurprised.  I was very excited that although he could not be with me at that moment, that he was able to tell him family that morning.  Apparently his mother knew too.  It would be 4 more weeks before I would get to see Dufda.  I can't even describe the feeling waiting in the airport.  I wanted to hug and squeeze him so bad.  Mostly because I missed him terribly, but also because we never got to be excited together and partly because I wanted to inflict some pain on him missing the beginning of my morning sickness. It is amazing to think back just one year ago and how different things were.  
So what would I tell that girl in the picture...Most would think it would be to sleep because you are never going to again (I say that in the most sarcastic voice ever).  That wouldn't be it all.  I actually wouldn't tell her anything, well maybe that Nugget is a boy so she could have shopped earlier.  I think that being naive about the whole experience is the best way to be.  I believe that it was the reason I was able to survive day to day through the pains of pregnancy.  I believe it is the reason I was able to birth with fear.  I also believe it was the reason that this no longer exists:
If you missed the post on me giving up my closet for the sake of baby, you can read it here.  

One year ago today; I knew nothing about car seat safety, SIDS risks, cloth diapers, breastfeeding, or what this little being would do to my life.  I knew that it would all be wonderful, though.  This morning, as I am pumping before going work.  This  little man was just laughing with me the entire time.
Its hard to believe in just a year how much your life has changed.  How you don't' really miss your walk in closet and all your clothes, because your baby has the most awesome nursery there is.  How little sleep you are able to survive on, not because you can't sleep, but because when your baby sleeps you would just rather stare at how amazing they are.  How natural being a parent is.  How much this little man has changed your relationship with your husband.  And how we made it through the craziest year of our lives.  We have been to Jordan and back twice!  I have survived throwing up more than I ever hope to in my life.  There were 3 different trips to the emergency room, none of which to birth a baby.  There were plenty of wedding and luckily no funerals.  I have made wonderful new mom friends to share the whole experience with.

Today will be a normal day, no one outwardly celebrates the day they found out they were pregnant.  I will go to work and later meet Dufda for Nugget's 4 month appointment.  We will then go through our new routine as Nugget's parents. But for me, it is just as special as a birthday, because for Dufda and I that day was the moment our entire lives changed.

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