Attachment Parenting. Why do they create and label things thus stereotyping individuals even further.
I feel like we are exposed to our parents style of, well, parenting. This usually consists of the ideas that the baby needs to cry it out, or at least cry for some period of time. I have been told this is good for their lungs. With this parenting style you are normally told that you don't want to hold your baby too much because it will spoil them. Most of these babies were sent to the nursery after birth. They were probably put in a crib by themselves the first night they were home. While this was very common in our parents days, it still lives on...but not in my household.
I never needed someone to teach me to be a parent and frankly I don't need someone's help with my baby. I had developed a way I would like to raise my child from what I believed. I also make sure that when making a decision that it is what I feel is right and not what I am told is right. For this reason, while I was giving birth no one was allowed in the room as a visitor who had previously given birth. When we went home, no one was allowed to come to our house unless they were invited. I wanted Dufda and I to be able to make mistakes and develop a parenting style that was right for us and not led by others information. Yes, I may be stubborn. Yes, my mother thinks I am crazy sometimes and other times flat out wrong.
My family's style of parenting would be considered "Attachment Parenting" . I hate that they have now created a name for this because it makes your parenting style "the latest trend", when in reality it is just what comes natural to you.
My bond with Nugget was formed immediately by him being placed on my bare chest the moment he was born. He was never moved to do test or taken to a nursery so someone else could care for him. This made breastfeeding very simple for us. Breastfeeding was hard at the beginning, but now I am hooked. I love the breastfeeding bond and even at just three months old, I get sad that one day he won't want to eat this way.
When we brought Nugget home, I could not fathom putting him in his nursery. Yes, I had spent months preparing this room for him and made sure he had crib to sleep in, but why after carrying him around for 9 months would I want to away from him or him from me. He doesn't. We co-slept and bed shared because it felt right. I don't like to sleep by myself so I couldn't imagine making my baby sleep by himself unless he chose to do so.
Babies love to be tight and close to you and this is why we babywear a lot. Nugget will always nap when wrapped. It also lets them see the world from your perspective which is a lot better than laying in a car seat or swing all day. Babies that are worn cry 53% less than their counterparts that aren't. And really, who doesn't love to have two hands free.
Speaking of crying...I would never let my baby cry it out. If a baby cries it is because it needs something. They lack the ability to manipulate you at this age. Babies can also not self soothe until 4 months old. To me, there is no reason for a baby to cry. I, as his mother, can fix it. I cringe when I here about parents letting their babies cry it out. How awful to be a little human who can't talk and to learn that you only mode of communication is now being ignored.
Finally, I do not follow a set schedule nor should my child. I will not force Nugget into something that he didn't lean towards on his own. Nugget had essentially made his own schedule, but he is able to change it up whenever he needs to.
I wish the world would stop telling us that we need to put our babies down, let them cry, don't nurse on demand, and stop spoiling them. We just love our children and feel that this is best.
